October

October.

This month is mine for the taking.

And I’m taking it.

I’m not letting another moment slip through my hands.

I have goals and aspirations and my god if I don’t complete them, I’ll burst.

This is everyone’s warning to prepare accordingly. I have stepped up my game. Nothing will stop me.

Without everything circling back to my trauma, it just always does. Last year on my birthday, October 26th I went into a surgery I had no plans of coming out of.

They didn’t know it, but inside, I said goodbye to my mom, my dad, and my now husband.

That’s a heavy weight for a 28 year old to handle. When I woke I’m I was in complete and utter shock that I was here that I had to make sure it was real.

I scribbled on a white board that a nurse gave me,

“I’m alive?”

My mom told me I was. I still had no idea how that could possibly be real. I had to be dreaming. This was some sort of alternate universe.

Not only we’re they able to stop the bleeding inside my body and remove half of my lung, but they were able to complete a full esophagectomy.

How? How in the hell was this done?

I spent that morning, the morning of my birthday, with family, nurses who became family and my doctors.

I celebrated this birthday. My 28th. Like it was going to be my absolute last.

But it’s not my last. Not now anyways.

29 is going to be my year, I just know it. So hold on tight because we’re about to take off!

xo

*THIS is the difference a year makes. Last year I was learning to walk for the 3rd time and this year I’m sipping coffee and making a school directive to finish my degree.

https://video.wixstatic.com/video/5709b5_e7336efb30f9473eba41856197dd0cd9/480p/mp4/file.mp4